Love, Regret and Comfort

I got another phone call tonight. The one no one likes to receive. The one where you know bad news is waiting on the other end. The one telling you something horrible has happened. This one, telling me my grandmother had passed away. It came at 9 pm and only lasted a minute. I saw "dad" come across my caller id and I knew what it was, deep down, I knew. I reluctantly answered the phone only to hear the news I'd been dreading on the other end. My sweet grandma passed away. It happened at home, exactly where she wanted to be. The home she shared with my grandpa for over 50 years. She couldn't imagine it happening anywhere else. She is finally reunited with my grandpa, after 4 years. They were married for 72 years and I'm sure these last 4 years without him have been heartbreaking. She kept up a good front for us kids, but I know she was aching on the inside. She just wanted to be with him. They were never apart and they have finally been brought back together. It is bitter sweet. I will miss her terribly and the lake won't be the same, but I know she is as happy as can be with my grandpa, in heaven. I love my grandmother and everything she has taught me. I will look back on those times and relish in the wonderful memories I have of her. I've been blessed to have had her in my life for 31 years. She was 96 and she was a spitfire! The reason she was still at home is because she wouldn't accept a permanent move to my parents. It wasn't in her to have others assisting her and waiting on her. That is what she did. She was always independent. It was hard for me to see her in these last few months. She was looking weak and I knew she wasn't happy, having to let people wait on her. I regret the fact that I didn't listen to the promptings I've had over the past week or so to call her. I used to be diligent in calling her every Tuesday night and that has lapsed for a long time now. I could have had one last conversation with her and told her I loved her one last time and I ignored that prompting. It was there. It was there and I didn't act on it. It is something I will always regret. I take comfort in the fact that I know she is in a better place. She is with my grandpa. She is without pain and suffering. She is happy! It's selfish of me to have wanted to keep her here for another summer, but I was hoping. I was hoping I would have another summer at the lake with her, knowing that it would most likely be my last. I was hoping that I would be able to get married before she passed. She wanted that. She told me that one day, but it didn't happen and I will never have that opportunity. Again, selfish. I know that I will see her again someday. It is just in the very distant future. I'm glad to know she is with my grandpa, her true love. I love you grandma. Thank you for everything that you've done for me. Till we meet again.