39 weeks and what not to say

I'm 39.5 weeks pregnant. Honestly, I didn't think I'd make it this far, given my family history. My sisters delivered all their kids early, as did my mother. I was 4 weeks early myself. However, this little guy is proving they come when they are ready.

Going through pregnancy during a worldwide pandemic has certainly been interesting. It really didn't hit until the very end of my pregnancy. I was still able to attend my 32 and 36 week appointments in person. However, the last few weeks have been over the phone. And they did add a 34 week appointment over the phone as well. But as we are very near the end, it is all becoming more real. We are lucky, in the sense that my husband can still be in the delivery room with me. That's assuming he doesn't have a fever when we go to the hospital. We will be confined to the delivery room, no roaming the halls during labor. Small sacrifice in the grand scheme of things. We will have to wear masks during labor. That part I'm not too excited about. We were told last week that we had to go through the ER upon arriving at the hospital. At my appointment this week, they said they are starting to open things up and if it's during normal hours, we can go through the main entrance. It literally changes every day.

The nice thing about having been quarantined for the last 10 weeks is that I haven't had to endure strangers wanting to touch my pregnant belly. But let's be honest, my BRF would have taken care of that anyway. And I almost made it through the entire pregnancy without random comments about my belly. But.....I didn't quite make it. I ventured out to go grocery shopping last week and got "You can't have much longer, right?" Which is basically code for you're ginormous! I realize I haven't gotten nearly the amount of comments that pregnant women get on a regular basis, but here are some that I've heard or have been told to some of my friends that are currently/recently pregnant:

• You're going to have a BIG baby
• You're huge!
• Have you lost all the baby weight yet?
• This one was while we were out for a walk one afternoon - Are you guys our new neighbors? After telling them we live on the street over.... Oh wow, do you want a ride back? We said we were okay and then he said, "I was just thinking of her...." Again, code for you're huge!

None of these comments are appropriate. I'm already terrified of having a gigantic baby. I don't need someone voicing those things out loud to me. Pregnant women don't need to be reminded that they're huge. We know it and feel it, every day. Have you lost all the baby weight yet? That's just beyond inappropriate. This was to a coworker. Not even remotely close to the type of relationship where you can ask that question. I'm just glad my interaction with these wonderful comments has been minimal, given all the social distancing going on.

We're excited to meet this new addition to our family. If he ever decides he's ready to come into this world, that is.

36 weeks and other feelings

Well, I'm nearing the end of this pregnancy journey and it's almost time to meet this little buddy of ours. As the time draws closer, my anxiety increases. Covid 19 is still a thing. Our state is still on stay at home watch. Everyone is working at home. Masks are being worn when you go out in public. Things are very different than what I had expected having a baby would look like.

I went to my 36 week appointment earlier this week. It was overwhelming to say the least. I am now temperature screened when I arrive at the doctor's office and required to wear a mask for the visit. My husband is no longer allowed to accompany me to the visits. I went to my appointment, gave my urine sample and they took my weight, as usual. Then I sat in the room and they took my vitals and told me to strip from the waist down, so they could do the strep B test. They don't give you a full gown for these procedures, they give you a sheet to cover your nether regions, which doesn't even wrap around your entire body. So, my backside is all on display for them as they walk back in the room. Then they leave you to sit on the uncomfortable table, half naked, for 15-20 minutes until the assistant comes in. I would have rather spent that time, fully clothed, sitting in the waiting room.

The assistant finally came in and she started off by telling me the new developments that have happened surrounding delivery in the time of the coronavirus. I was informed that I will be screened for covid upon arriving at the hospital to deliver. She said 30% of pregnant women are asymptomatic carriers. If I test positive, I will be separated from baby after birth. This means, no first contact for me. No skin to skin bonding time with the child I've carried for 9 months. I won't be able to breastfeed. I will have to pump and my husband will have to do the feedings for the baby. This separation would continue upon discharge from the hospital, for the recommended two weeks. I will have to wear a mask for the duration of labor. I figured this last one was going to be a thing, but was really hoping not. The masks are already uncomfortable, just sitting in the doctor's office, waiting to be seen, I was getting sick of it. I can't imagine what hours of labor are going to be like, with a mask around my face. All of this was overwhelming. She continued to recommend no visitors. Again, I'm fine with no random visitors, but my mom was supposed to come out for two weeks. Since she lives in another state, she would have to self quarantine for 14 days upon arrival. All of this was a lot to take in. I had a breakdown in the doctor's office. I felt bad, but it's a lot to handle and being a first time mom, this is not anything I was prepared to deal with. I left the appointment, got in my car and just continued to cry. We've been very careful about not seeing many people and limiting our time in the public. I'm not necessarily afraid of testing positive, but of course my mind is going to think worst case scenario, so I was not in a good place emotionally.

Since the appointment, I have ordered necessary items to be able to pump and store milk, in the event I'm not able to directly breastfeed my child. I have gotten a few more things ready at the house, in the event he decides to come early. I'm hoping that all goes well, but this is certainly not how I pictured having my first baby would go. I'm just trying to focus on hoping that he's healthy and all goes well with the delivery and we're able to bring him home and remain safe.